The answer....

Well, my mom and I talked... She is not willing to answer one of the questions... The one question I have to have to finish the paper work.... Still praying, still leaning on God.....

Relying on YOU!!!

Ok, so I was filling out my FAFSA paper work tonight for financial aid for college, and I came to a problem...... Some of the questions they ask are about your parents. Well, some of them I cant answer when it comes to my mom... There lies my problem. I can't finish the paper work without the answers and I don't know how to ask my mom for them.... She has already expressed her opinion on me going to college and they weren't good... I just don't know how to approach this one. If your reading this, please join me in prayer. Please pray for guidance, wisdom, courage, and faith. I'm learning to lean on my Savior more and more on a daily basis. I know He is in control and that He will work everything out. Its just me being human have my concerns. I'm nervous and kind of scared to go to my mom... I don't know what to say or how to say it. I need this SO bad. I can't go to college without some kind of financial support....I want this so bad it hurts and I feel I have something in the way... I don't like that! I will be talking to my mother in a couple of days... I will let you all know how it goes...

Father, you know my dreams and desires. I know that if its in Your will it will happen. So, Lord I ask that YOUR will be done. I'm leaning on YOU! Lord, please give me the words, wisdom, and courage to talk to my mom. Let it be a good conversation. Thank you Lord for helping me rely on You. Thank you for showing me I can go somewhere and become something! You are AMAZING and all powerful! I love you and am giving this to You!

God is SOOO good!

I'm so excited to be writing this right now!!! The bad thing is, I REALLY wish I could call my dear fiend Pam up RIGHT now!! Oh well....! Anyways, I just got off the phone with another dear friend and God used her in mighty ways! So, we were talking and the subject of boundaries came up... (Pam, I know what your thinking....! Yes, you were right!!) As we were talking and she was sharing her thoughts I realized these ladies are right. How can God use me and work in my life if I don't set boundaries with certain people. I mean, if I let someone get to me so much that I question my worth... That's questioning God... And what He has made... That's never good. I know that I'm no good at setting boundaries, but with God all things are possible!! Right??!! I think I'm ready... (And Pam, I'm sorry I didn't listen to you earlier...) I guess hearing it from someone who is or did go through kind of the same situation helps.. Its like she has or is going through the same thing, I can see where it actually works! I mean, hearing that it will work is one thing, but when you see that it works is a whole other story... I guess I just always saw it as something that wouldn't really make a difference. Or that it doesn't really matter what I do.... My thought has always been, I just can't do it. I don't have it in me... Or, why even try.. Sure it sounds good, but really does it work... Well, I see now that it can and I'm ready to try it out! So, like my dear friend said. We are going to look at boundaries this month... I can do this.. I think!

Lord God, you are AMAZING! Thank you SO much for using these ladies in my life! Thank you for speaking to me tonight! You are a mighty God and I know with You I can do this! Father, please help me. Give me the strength that only comes from You. I love You Father God! You keep AMAZING me! You work in WONDERFUL ways! Thank you! Oh, and help me to look in the mirror tomorrow and see who You see!

Broken

How can one person get to you so much...? How can they push every button and get you to come unglued SO bad...? I'm trying to learn to not let it all get to me so bad, but its SO hard... I feel like the little girl I was so many years ago... In a little ball in the corner... Its like I'm screaming on the inside and yet I have a smile on, on the outside.... I feel as though I'm pretty put together in most parts of my life, but when it comes to this.... I'm SO not together.... It hurts SO bad...
Lord, take the pain away... Help me to deal with all this. Help me see myself the way You see me... Lord work on my heart. I love you more then anything and I want you to work on me... Please Lord, heal my broken heart. Put it back together! I love you!

Looking UP!!!

God is giving me the strength to push forward! This weekend has been hard, but I have God with me! Thank you Lord for being there ALWAYS! How I love you!

Free to be me!!!

If your reading my blog right now your probably listening to my playlist as well.... Well, if you go all the way to the bottom of my page you will find my playlist... Please go to song 15. Free to be me.... Its my new song! God is amazing! Just wanted to share!!!

God bless!

GAP

Your probably wondering what GAP is...!! Well, its a college age group in my church! We get together and have fun! God blessed me when He put this group in my life! I have made new friends and have learned the meaning of good clean fun! I have met some WONDERFUL people threw this group and am so thankful that God placed me where He did when He did! God has given me true happiness and JOY! These are just some of the many pictures I have captured while enjoying GAP!

God blessed me when He put her in my life!

The Winters plus an Autumn... This is what you get!!!

Gap friends!!!